


You can't lead a fire to a forest (It burns all the same.)

by AnotherAmericanTragedy_20



Category: Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, But there might a a sequal, Gen, It's literally all this is, Just angst, One Shot, With a bit of humour, im sorry, please vote
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:14:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27356335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnotherAmericanTragedy_20/pseuds/AnotherAmericanTragedy_20
Summary: “Master, and Snips too, since I’m sure you’re listening. No, this one isn't for Padmé, the other one’s for her. Well, if you’re listening to this, then I hope it’s for the second alternative, and not this first one. The first one is I died."
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 16
Kudos: 27





	You can't lead a fire to a forest (It burns all the same.)

**Author's Note:**

> I'll talk about my story in the chapter notes, but I want to start with this:
> 
> Tomorrow is a big day. Please vote. By doing that, you're making history. We CAN make a difference in this country. I'm not saying Biden 2020, or Trump 2020, but I am saying it's up to you to help America. In whichever way you can. I'm not old enough to vote- but some of you are. Please do. If not voting, for whatever reason, please encourage others around you to make a difference. Thank you for listening to this, we have the option to do great things- but only if we allow ourselves. 
> 
> Okay, chapter notes:
> 
> It's literally angst. Just plain angst. With a touch of happy, and then more angst. NOT A HAPPY ENDING. I don't own any of the songs or quotes Anakin says. I've stated which bands wrote and sang the songs I copied. The only quotes I do own are the ones bolded. And the harbor me quote. I also DO NOT own Star Wars. Ready for the tears? Read ahead, my dear viewer.

_ “Master, and Snips too, since I’m sure you’re listening. No, this one isn't for Padmé, the other one’s for her. Well, if you’re listening to this, then I hope it’s for the second alternative, and not this first one. The first one is I died, well- both options involve my death, but the first one- well, umm, the first one isn’t as pleasant.  _

_ “The first one is I died, in some sort of battle, and I didn’t bring balance to the Force, or maybe I’m in a coma, and the chances of me waking up are slim. The second one is I do bring balance to the Force, but my death was caused by that. Maybe that’s what’s needed to happen, to bring balance to the force. I’m too powerful, I know that. But somehow, for some stupid reason, I want more. I think that’ll be my downfall, my arrogance. The worst part is, I know that, and yet my ego gets bigger, and bigger, each day. _

_ “So I’m starting this log. Cause one day, I’ll slip up, or maybe I’ll come at my time (which is highly unlikely, because, is there ever a “good time” to die, really?) But I wanted to give you something, in case that happens. So, umm… I’m not gonna say dates, I’m sure you’ll figure that out, when I talk about missions. Or anything, really. Sometimes, I’ll request for just Obi-Wan to listen, or just Ahsoka.  _

_ “Sometimes, I’ll just be screaming, or crying, and cursing, or singing, because I bet you didn’t know I could sing, did you? Some days I’ll be talking rationally, some days I’ll be so kriffing pissed I won’t know what to say, and you’ll just hear static-y silence. I have so much to say, so much I can’t tell you, but I’ll tell you now. Because that’s the point of this. If I don’t talk, you’ll never know, and I’ll never get it off my chest. Just a warning- this includes the “L” word. That’s right. Love.  _

_ “Oh no! The dreaded “L” word! Whatever shall we do? See, I think that’s where the Jedi get it wrong. It isn’t about letting your emotions go into the force. The force is the energy, and the life, and non-existent life. And life, and energy, are the emotions. The Force is the love, and passion, and the hate, and the war, and the impatience, and the consequences, and the imperfections, and the arrogance, and the ignorance, and the bliss, and pleasure. And  _ LOVE _. See, I think that’s why I’m the chosen one, about all else. It’s not from my midi-chlorian count. Or my skills, or my powers.  _

_ “It’s because of my emotions. I am all of those things, and I’m not afraid to show it, to bend the rules. I follow the force, not the “good,” or “bad.” Those are just things we decide based on our morals, and ethics. There are no “heroes” or “evil.” There’s people that make the right decisions, or the one that isn’t right at the time.  _

_ “I follow the force. Not just one aspect, like the Sith or the Jedi, or the space in between, like the Gray Jedi, but all of it. Like it was intended to be followed. _

_ “Well- I assume how it was intended to be followed. With the force, who really knows? _

_ “So I’m gonna talk, really talk. And I’m not gonna stop, and I’m not sure I’ll show my face, but I’m gonna talk, so please, please listen. _

_ “I think I’ll do this clue-like style, right? Give you a clue at the end, and that where the next recording chip’ll be. And my story’s long. Like, really, really long, so I hope you’re prepared to listen. _

_ “But first- I want to talk to each of you. Just- alone, the other one not listening. I mean, you can listen, but- I think it’ll be more personal this way. But before I do, I want to apologize. I’m sorry for dumping this on you, for giving you this burden, and these questions, without the answers you want, and the realizations and the revolutions I had planned. If you want to stop- now's the time to do that. I won’t stop you. Just go ahead, walk away.  _

_ “But you won’t, will you? Because now you’re hooked. Now, you’re drawing up forbidden emotions, and sentiment is clouding your judgement, and you think you might be feeling those forbidden things you shouldn’t. _

_ “And I’m so, so sorry for making you listen like this. For playing emotions. It wasn’t my intent- but then again, a lot of things never were. But they happened anyway. So maybe this- this was supposed to happen. My death. This recording.  _

_ “So- I’m sure you know who’s going first- and it’s not personal (but maybe it is, since this whole thing is all personal.) but I’ll say it anyway. So, Obi-Wan, could you please step out of this room, or not, cause I won’t know, because, ding ding ding, Snips, you’re up. _

_ “Hey Ahsoka. I imagine, as you’re listening to this, you're looking like a knight. No, a master. And I don’t want you to go another second without knowing how proud I am of you. Because I am. So, so, proud. And inspired. And a little jealous, if I’m honest. You had the courage to do what I couldn’t do- leave the order, on my own terms. We both know that if I left the order, I would’ve either been expelled, or- well, dead. I’m sorry. Is that still too touchy? _

_ “Because I’ve come to terms with the fact that I might die- that's why I’m making this recording. I’m doing it practically all in one sitting- drawing upon memories on top of memories, to make this for you. I’m being blunt- but, I don’t have the time to afford to be sad, not when I can be spending time with the people I love (because, yes, I do love you), or making something like this, to try and help them get over my death. Because I don’t want this to affect you, my death, Ahsoka. But I know it will. _

_ “You’re too much like me for my own good. You love to be strong, feel too much, have too many opinions. But that’s always something I loved about you- you knew how to manage those emotions, and when you didn’t, you went for help. You were the sensible one, unlike me, I’m afraid.  _

_ “And- god Snips, I’m afraid of so many things. But I don’t want to talk about me. Well, kind of. This is supposed to be about me, after all. But I’m talking about me- by talking about you. Does that make sense? Kriff, I hope so.  _

_ “So I’ll just talk about all those things I love about you. Because there’s so, so many.  _

_ “I love the way your eyes light up whenever Rex, Obi-Wan, me, Plo-Koon, Kix, Fives, or anyone you care about, comes into the room. I love the carefree way you laugh, wholeheartedly and undeniably real.  _

_ “I love the way you talk with me, really talk- either in banter, or maybe you’re screaming, or we’re hugging and crying, or laughing, or you’re saying something through our force bond, or maybe you’re not talking, but you’re projecting through the force, so I know what you’re saying anyway. _

_ “Or maybe you're just silent- but the silence is enough. And you’re still talking anyway. _

_ “I love your morals. I love how black and white you see things. _

_ “A lot of people think I see in black in white. It has to be one or the other. I know Obi-Wan thinks that. But no, I’ve been cursed. And yes, I do consider it a curse. You Snips, you see in black and white. Not ignorant- those who are ignorant see in just gray. No. You just see things so simply- it’s either good, or bad. Those good or bad things can mean different things, sure, but they each have a value. And it’s just that. Black or white. _

_ “Obi-Wan, (and I’m addressing this to you if you are sitting here, listening,) you see in shades of gray. No black and white, it’s all gray. Some things are more pure than others, some things have more intended bad causes, but nothing is truly good, or bad. People like that- they  _ feel _ cursed, but they’re not. They get to see everything as it is, but just the shell. They see all aspects, except the most important part of that thing. The  _ life _ behind it.  _

_ “Not me. That’s why I’m cursed. I see in colours. Beautiful, horrible, merciful, awful colours.  _

_ Opaque, dark, light, all the different hues. The colours the light makes, and the colours that come from all life’s pigment, blood. In some form or another. I  _ feel _ , rather than see. That’s why I see colours. The brightest of yellows, the darkest of reds. The purest of blues, the brownest of green. The royal of purple, and the soothing of teal.  _

_ “In my mind, each person is a color. Snips, you’re yellow. No- not yellow. A yellow green. Because you’re one of a kind. You’re like me. And Qui-Gon. Because, yes, he’s included in this too. You’re so bright, and full of life- so green. But you’re unorthodox. I’m afraid you got that from me. But maybe, that’s just you. You can choose. You’re yellow.  _

_ “Obi-Wan, you’re colour is- well. I won’t say it, will I? That’ll be an incentive, to keep you motivated. If this whole thing isn’t motivation enough.  _

  
  


_ “But, I digress. Wow, big word, I know. Snips. Ahsoka. I mean to be talking about you.  _

_ “But one more thing about the colours- I don’t think it’s a flaw. I think we need more people, who can see like you do. Who are so clear sighted, that they just know. They're my favorite kind of people. No offence, Master. You know I’m making an exception for you.  _

_ “So what have I gone over already? You laugh, your eyes, the way you talk, your colour- I am just so, so proud of you, Ahsoka. You have no idea. Never, in this lifetime, or a hundred, could I have asked for a better Padawan. Thank you. _

_ “I love you. _

_ “Well, Snips- now I’m gonna ask you to leave. Or not, if you’re staying. Which- I bet you’re both staying for. Moral support, and all. So, Master, your turn. _

_ “Well… I want to start by saying thank you. I think you deserve enough thank yous to last you- well, I’m sure I can fill every building here on Coruscant with thank you’s, and that wouldn't be enough.  _

_ “I guess I’ll start with the colour- your incentive, after all. You know, I’ve thought long and hard about what colour to give you- before I thought of the obvious. Blue. _

_ “But- not any shade of blue. I think an ice blue- yeah, that’s it. It’s kind of perfect, now that I think about it. _

_ “Ice- is cold. Hard. Unforgiving. If- if you look to close, you only see your own imperfections. You never see the ice’s flaws, or all the qualities that it possesses, you only see yourself. But if you don't know how to look- you just see ice. Sometimes invisible- sometimes too cold, too- just, too icy. But, if you wait- and look at it from the right distance, you see it start to thaw. You see all the imperfections, the little cracks that were invisible before.  _

_ “You also see the more beautiful parts of it, like the way the sunlight shines through just right, or how nice it really is, not warm, but not exactly cold either. Just- there. Like a shoulder to cry on, someone who will listen. _

_ “So, thank you Master. Thank you, Obi-Wan Kenobi, for being like ice. Thank you, for laughing with me, for putting up with me, for smiling, for praising, for fighting, for helping, for being there. There is literally no one else in my life who could ever fill your shoes- because, well, your feet are impossibly small. _

_ “Quite literally, really. I swear, they're smaller than Master Yoda’s. And now I hope you’re both laughing, loving my abrupt change of subject. Geez me, again with the big words. I am on a roll! _

_ “Back to subject, very abrupt again, I know. Obi-Wan, thank you. Thank you so, so, so much. Y- you were my brother. In literally all but blood. But I don’t think that’s true- because, like most Jedi know, your family isn’t determined by blood. It’s through the relationships that you make, and the hearts that you heal.  _

_ “Thank you, Master. _

_ “I love you. _

_ “Some people hate you because other people love you.” _

**I see the sun set, but I am not afraid. I cherish it with open arms, welcome it with a warm embrace.**

_ “Hey guys. I bet you didn’t think my clue would lead you to the Council Chambers, did you? I bet you scrambled frantically, finally found this chip, and placed it in the Holovid recorder player I left with the first recording. I bet the other Council members are staring at you and Ahsoka in wonder, but then heard my voice, and some sort of pity filled their gazes. Maybe even you, Mace.  _

_ “Don’t give them pity. I know my Master and Padawan, they won’t want that. It’ll be the exact opposite, actually. They’ll want you to empathize. Not feel bad for them, but feel with them.  _

_ “Oh my force, Anakin Skywalker, that was deep. Here, I’ll give you each Master’s reaction: _

_ “Master Plo Koon: Well, he certainly was brighter than I gave him credit for. Maybe he was even good enough to have trained Ahsoka.  _

_ “Mace Windu: Fuck it, Skywalker had the last word. Damn. And why am I the only one being addressed without the word Master? _

_ “Master Yoda: You probably just hmmd, because you already knew that this was here.  _

_ “Master Ki-Adi-Mundi: You probably just sighed dramatically, and put your head in your hands.  _

_ “Master: We already went over this in the first recording.  _

_ “Master Agen Kolar, Master Coleman Kcaj, Master Kit Fisto, Master Shaak Ti, Master Staas Allie: I don’t know you as well as the others, so I’m going to go out on a limb and say you didn’t like me, and didn’t- and still maybe don’t- trust me. So, I’m sure some of you grumbled. Maybe made an over exaggerated “woe’s me” expression. _

_ “I probably got that spot on, didn’t I? Not trying to be arrogant, just, I’m good at reading people. I just let my emotions get in the way before I make a rational decision.  _

_ “So last time, the clue was a quote. All of the clues will be quotes, by the way. The quote was “Some people hate you because other people love you.” I’m guessing you figured out what I’ll be talking about this time ‘round. _

_ “What you all thought of me. Like, the worst part, the one thing you hoped I never had picked up on, the one emotion you never wanted me to know you felt about me.  _

_ “So, this time Master, you’re first. The one emotion you never wanted me to know you felt about me is jealousy. Now, you’re scoffing, but don’t scoff- because I’m not talking about the fame, or the power. No.  _

_ “You, unfortunately, are one of the few people that are jealous for all the right reasons. Which makes telling you why you're jealous so much harder. You might ask why, I’m telling you all of these things. I’m going to say that once I finish with everyone I want to talk to.  _

_ “I’ll just apologize in advance. Because what I’m going to say is going to reveal some secrets, and make some of you cry, and yes, council members, I use the word  _ love _ a lot, so don’t get all high and mighty about that. So I apologize for that, but I need to say these things. I don’t know why- but listen to the force, you’ll see I’m right.  _

_ “Obi-Wan Kenobi, you are jealous of me for two things. The first has to do with a man called Qui-Gon Jinn. See? I told you he’d be brought up again. You're’ jealous because you thought he was going to choose me over you. You thought he was replacing you- that I was just another pathetic life form he had picked up along the way. But you didn’t think that in detest. No. You thought that in despair. _

_ “After the AgriCorps, and Bandomeer, and Melinda/Daan, you were supposed to be the last pathetic life form. But then he found this little boy. On a remote, dusty, miserable sand-ball of a planet. And he risked so much for that boy to be made a Jedi. To even get off of Tatooine. And then he asked to train me. And you, Council, said he could not have two apprentices at the same time. And you thought he was dismissing you, by saying you were ready for the trails. You thought he was just waving his hand to be rid of you, for someone new, someone even more different. _

_ “You were jealous of the ease it took for me to have the chance to become Qui-Gon Jinn’s padawan. You had to go through everything you and him went through, and then this little boy, barely even nine, is automatically sought out by the man you called master. _

_ “He wasn’t picking you over me?” You’ll think. _

_ “You’ll also raise an eyebrow at this, expression clearly saying, “oh really, Anakin?” _

_ “And I’ll explain why.  _

_ “He cared about you, so much, you literally had to be blinded in every sense of the word not to see it. He loved you. I’m so sure of it, I would’ve bet R2. And I  _ never _ bet R2. _

_ “He wasn’t casting you aside. He saw something in me, and I’m not sure what it was (or maybe I am, and I’m just trying to be modest, so relish that, because it almost never happens.) _

_ “But it wasn’t the same as when he looked at you. When he looked at me, all he could see was potential. Not potential as a person, or even a Jedi. No. Potential to fill a stupid fucking prophecy. I’m not going to go into the prophecy, that’s a whole ‘nother section.  _

_ “But when he looked at you, you could see the pride there, clear as day. He said it wrong, and handled it wrong, be he was right when he said he thought you were ready for the trails. He was so proud of you, and so, so impressed. And he wasn’t ready to let you go, not in a million years, but he was willing, because he saw how great of a Jedi, no- a  _ person _ , you’d become.  _

_ “The second reason you're jealous of me is because of my relationship with Padmé. No, you didn love her, or at least- not in the way that I did. Cause I'm going to go out and say it- I love Senator Amidala. So much, in fact, that I married her. Now youŕe gasping. Master, Snips, you thought we were in a relationship, sure, but I bet you didn't know that we were married, did you? _

_ “But you, Obi-Wan Kenobi, are jealous, because you wanted the same thing with Satine Kryze. I got to marry the politician, and be so happy for a multitude of years-only a short few though, since we got married after Geonosis- you wanted that with Satine. You loved her. You loved her so much, and I got to have what you didn’t have. You’re so, so jealous of that, and as you’re listening to that, you’re thinking, “force damn it, Anakin.” _

_ “I- that’s it. You know, I had so much more planned to say- but now I just- I just don’t. I- I- I’m just moving on right now.  _

_ “Um, Ahsoka- ah- well- god, umm- I- I just- wow. I really- I just- I can’t- you what- you’ll just have to wait for the next chip. Yeah- umm, yeah, okay- okay. _

_ “All good things are wild and free.” _

**That warm embrace becomes me, takes my soul, mind, and heart. And the dark night rises before me, replacing light with shadows.**

_ “I’m sorry for my change of scenery so soon. Room of a Thousand Fountains, no bad, right? I just- I don’t know, I couldn’t continue. So now Ahsoka, I guess. _

_ “Snips, the one emotion you never wanted me to know you felt about me was disappointment. I know what you’re going to say- I’m not disappointed in you. But you were, that first time we met. You were so excited to finally be a Padawan- and then there was a master for you, how you thought didn’t want you. (And I wanted you, Snips. You’re my sister. I just didn’t know I needed you at the time.) _

_ “You were expecting some huge, big shining hero. But every fight- every time I made a mistake that impacted others, everytime I did the wrong thing, you realized that I was just Anakin. And that can never be enough for people, can it? I have to be Knight Skywalker, or General Skywalker, or The Hero with no Fear, or the Chosen One. I always hated titles. Maybe that’s why I liked our nicknames so much.  _

_ “I had a lot more prepared to say- but instead, I’m gonna sing. I know. Sing? Oh no, better cover your ears. Well, my wife says I’m pretty good- so, here it goes. This song is called It’s Time, by a band I like, called Imagine Dragons. I actually think the song’s pretty fitting, for talking about disappointment.  _

_ “ _ _ So this is what you meant _

_ When you said that you were spent _

_ And now it's time to build from the bottom of the pit, right to the top _

_ Don't hold back _

_ Packing my bags and giving the Academy a rain check _

_ I don't ever want to let you down _

_ I don't ever want to leave this town _

_ 'Cause after all _

_ This city never sleeps at night _

_ It's time to begin, isn't it? _

_ I get a little bit bigger but then I'll admit _

_ I'm just the same as I was _

_ Now don't you understand _

_ I'm never changing who I am _

_ So this is where you fell _

_ And I am left to sell _

_ The path to heaven runs through miles of clouded hell right to the top _

_ Don't look back _

_ Turning to rags and giving the commodities a rain check _

_ I don't ever want to let you down _

_ I don't ever want to leave this town _

_ 'Cause after all _

_ This city never sleeps at night _

_ It's time to begin, isn't it? _

_ I get a little bit bigger but then I'll admit _

_ I'm just the same as I was _

_ Now don't you understand _

_ I'm never changing who I am _

_ It's time to begin, isn't it? _

_ I get a little bit bigger but then I'll admit _

_ I'm just the same as I was _

_ Now don't you understand _

_ I'm never changing who I am _

_ This road never looked so lonely _

_ This house doesn't burn down slowly _

_ To ashes _

_ To ashes _

_ It's time to begin, isn't it? _

_ I get a little bit bigger but then I'll admit _

_ I'm just the same as I was _

_ Now don't you understand _

_ I'm never changing who I am _

_ It's time to begin, isn't it? _

_ I get a little bit bigger but then I'll admit _

_ I'm just the same as I was _

_ Now don't you understand _

_ I'm never changing who I am. _

_ “I bet you’re sitting there, stunned. Or I hope, at least. Anyway, clue time, I guess. Oh, make sure Yoda and Mace are with you for this next one. _

_ “Better to fight for something than live for nothing.” _

**Those shadows are swallowing me, taking me, and I’m desperate, gasping for air. But the air never comes, and I’m sinking, and the darkness is overcoming me.**

_ “Well, training Dojo. Do you like my creativity? I’m very pleased with it. You’re probably surprised with how far I took this, aren’t you? _

_ “Welp, Master Yoda. Sit tight, Mace. I enjoy making you frustrated. Master Yoda. Master Yod-ah. Master Yo-duh. Okay, I’m stalling. Master Yoda- you appreciate me. There. I said it. You can all start laughing now. But before you do- let me explain.  _

_ “I can understand what it feels like for you. The force is pushing, pulling, crashing, and slamming like some invisible tide that you can’t fight against, and it’s taking your everything, and you’re going under, and you can’t stop it. I understand that. _

_ “I understand what it’s like to be so intune with the force, that you can feel every scream of pain. Every gasp of terror. Every invisible luggage that was once only one person’s is now yours too.  _

_ “The waves keep coming, pulling, pushing, grabbing, choking, and they don’t stop. There’s never any clarity, only more and more darkness, more and more light being pushed away, out of reach, and you’re sinking, drowning in the force, and you can’t trust that force, not when it’s hurting you- not when it’s letting millions of lives be killed. _

_ “It’s actions are never clear, and when it is clear, you don’t know it until it’s too late.  _

_ “You appreciate that I can see the force for what it really is- a burden you’ve had to carry alone for centuries. _

_ “Now, Mace Windu. Mace, can I call you Mace? Eh, I’ve been doing it for years behind your back- and to your face, so why stop now? Mace Windu, you’ve always pitied me. _

_ “You understood what it was like to be singled out- to have been raised upon a pedestal you didn’t ask for, just for some ability that you don’t even understand. I used to feel bad for you- because you had to watch me- see the shatterpoint that it was. I can understand that- watching some, slip away, knowing you can do nothing, and feel hundreds of other things like it, yet not.  _

_ “You pitied me because I couldn’t see that darkness in me as something other than a flaw. I had no balance, so it was shocking that I could bring balance to the force.  _

_ “You could embrace the darkness, have it be a part of you- purple. You were so purple Master Mace Windu, it was shocking. You pitied that for me, it had to be one or the other. You pitied me that I had to be this shining beacon of light and purity, and goodness, when I was so far from any of those things. _

_ “Now, I guess, I’ll explain why I’m telling you all this. It isn’t to prove some point- or to show some sort of superiority, no- I’m trying to help you all- in some weird- twisted sense, I guess. I’m pouring my heart and soul out to you here, so don’t take it lightly when I say this- especially you, Master and Snips. You’re going to have a very, very, very hard time letting me go.  _

_ “But in order to do that- in order for you to let go of me- not my memory, or the love, but let go of the idea that I’m coming back, because I’m not. This isn’t Jabiim. There was no greater objective, no other motive. I died. Simple as that. _

_ “So you need to let me go. _

_ “You need to take those long harbored feelings, the ones you push down so deep you almost forget, yet not, since they burden you in a way you’ll never forget, but you need to acknowledge them, and deal with them. So here is your prompt: the voice of a dead man telling you the things you swore never to reveal. Now, go deal with them. Before you do, though. I have another song. _

_ “That’s right, Yoda and Mace! I, Anakin Skywalker, can sing. It reminds me of the force, in a way. Cause that’s all the force really is. _

_ “A song. A sweet melody, coupled with a dark harmony, with staccatos and codas and crescendos and notes that keep getting rewritten. We, as living beings? We’re just lyrics that go with the beat. So here’s another song, by a band I detest, but love this one song: How to Save a Life. You read? Nope. Am I? Never. Here I go.  _

_ “ _ _ Step one, you say we need to talk _

_ He walks, you say sit down, it's just a talk _

_ He smiles politely back at you _

_ You stare politely right on through _

_ Some sort of window to your right _

_ As he goes left, and you stay right _

_ Between the lines of fear and blame _

_ You begin to wonder why you came _

_ Where did I go wrong? _

_ I lost a friend _

_ Somewhere along in the bitterness _

_ And I would have stayed up with you all night _

_ Had I known how to save a life _

_ Let him know that you know best _

_ 'Cause after all, you do know best _

_ Try to slip past his defense _

_ Without granting innocence _

_ Lay down a list of what is wrong _

_ The things you've told him all along _

_ And pray to God he hears you _

_ And I pray to God he hears you _

_ And where did I go wrong? _

_ I lost a friend _

_ Somewhere along in the bitterness _

_ And I would have stayed up with you all night _

_ Had I known how to save a life _

_ As he begins to raise his voice _

_ You lower yours and grant him one last choice _

_ Drive until you lose the road _

_ Or break with the ones you've followed _

_ He will do one of two things _

_ He will admit to everything _

_ Or he'll say he's just not the same _

_ And you'll begin to wonder why you came _

_ Where did I go wrong? _

_ I lost a friend _

_ Somewhere along in the bitterness _

_ And I would have stayed up with you all night _

_ Had I known how to save a life _

_ Where did I go wrong? _

_ I lost a friend _

_ Somewhere along in the bitterness _

_ And I would have stayed up with you all night _

_ Had I known how to save a life _

_ How to save a life _

_ How to save a life _

_ Where did I go wrong? _

_ I lost a friend _

_ Somewhere along in the bitterness _

_ And I would have stayed up with you all night _

_ Had I known how to save a life _

_ Where did I go wrong? _

_ I lost a friend _

_ Somewhere along in the bitterness _

_ And I would have stayed up with you all night _

_ Had I known how to save a life _

_ How to save a life _

_ How to save a life. _

_ “I hope I know how to save a life. Because I’ve taken so many. But maybe, just maybe, if these recordings have the effect I want them too- they can save a life. Two or three in particular. Mace, Master Yoda, thank you for listening. I don’t think I’ll be talking to you, so I’d appreciate you not coming to anymore of these listenings. Unless, you’re invited, of course. Which, sorry for saying- is very, very, very unlikely. _

_ “Flying is learning how to through yourself at the ground and miss.” _

**And then the darkness is lifting, and rising above me, until it fills the sky, and I’m soaring, away, away, and away from this destiny I’m running from.**

_ “I fucking hate the prophecy. I never asked for it, but suddenly, it's all I am. This burden I never wanted, this new unwelcome part of me I could never really accept. It was all consuming, and so loud, pulling and pushing and grabbing and taking all of me. I was nothing but an opportunity for the Jedi order, and I fucking hated it. I kriffin' hated it so much. And i-it-it- I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. I'm falling, I'm falling and slipping and plunging and sinking and I can't stop and it hurts. _

_"It won't stop, and it keeps going, and going, and I'm going to fall, and it'll be over and I'll have failed everyone, and i'm sorry! I'm sorry I couldn't do more, and I've let you all down, but I'm still falling. Falling and falling ang going and I'm not stopping and the darkness is all over me._

_"Oh how he loved to be home."_

**And I'm flying, but reality has wrapped itself around me and it won't let go. And so I'm crashing back towards the ground, towards my demons, and it won't stop. Not for me, not for anyone.**

_"..."_

_"Sick of crying, tired of trying, yes I'm smiling, but inside I'm dying._

**And then I realized it was never about me. No. Just what I could offer, as the ground came closer and closer. As I fell to my death, I smiled, for in what had been a very long time.**

_"It was never about me. Or you, Master, or Snips. Just the legacy. The legacy we all leave behind, never truly there, yet never leaving us. It's about the legacy. Just that. So it's up to you for how I'll be remembered. For how my story's shared. For how I'll be viewed for as long as my memory's alive. So I'll give you something, something that my make you want to through my name in the trash, rake it through the mud._

_"On the night my mother died, I was there, holding her in my arms. Her last words were how she loved me. Ironic. I don't think she would've loved me if she knew what I did next. I killed them. Every single Tusken Raider in the village. The men, the woken, the innocent, the children. All dead by my hand. And I hated myself. And I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm so, so, so sorry. Please- if nothing else, know that I regret it. I love you. I love you, Obi-Wan and Ahsoka. I don't deserve your love. I'm a murderer. I just- I'm so, so, so sorry. I think I'll stop talking now, since right now, you hate me. So here's the quote. If you want to find me again. If you don't I understand. But know this, Snips and Master, I love you. I love you so much it hurts. I love you._

_"I'll harbor you. Will you harbor me? Will you take my hand, learn and grow with me, as I you?"_

**And plummet, I did, towards the ground, towards home, and it felt right. And when I hit the ground, I knew where I was going. Home.**

_ "You're not alone _

_ Together we stand _

_ I'll be by your side _

_ You know I'll take your hand _

_ When it gets cold _

_ And it feels like the end _

_ There's no place to go _

_ You know I won't give in _

_ No, I won't give in _

_ Keep holding on _

_ 'Cause you know we'll make it through _

_ We'll make it through _

_ Just stay strong _

_ 'Cause you know I'm here for you _

_ I'm here for you _

_ There's nothing you could say _

_ Nothing you could do _

_ There's no other way when it comes to the truth _

_ So keep holding on _

_ 'Cause you know we'll make it through _

_ We'll make it through _

_ So far away _

_ I wish you were here _

_ Before it's too late _

_ This could all disappear _

_ Before the doors close _

_ And it comes to an end _

_ With you by my side, I will fight and defend _

_ I'll fight and defend _

_ Yeah, yeah _

_ Keep holding on _

_ 'Cause you know we'll make it through _

_ We'll make it through _

_ Just stay strong _

_ 'Cause you know I'm here for you _

_ I'm here for you _

_ There's nothing you could say _

_ Nothing you could do _

_ There's no other way when it comes to the truth _

_ So keep holding on _

_ 'Cause you know we'll make it through _

_ We'll make it through _

_ Hear me when I say, when I say I believe _

_ Nothing's gonna change _

_ Nothing's gonna change destiny _

_ Whatever's meant to be will work out perfectly _

_ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah _

_ La da da da _

_ La da da da _

_ La da da da da da da da da _

_ Keep holding on _

_ 'Cause you know we'll make it through _

_ We'll make it through _

_ Just stay strong _

_ 'Cause you know I'm here for you _

_ I'm here for you _

_ There's nothing you could say _

_ Nothing you could do _

_ There's no other way when it comes to the truth _

_ So keep holding on _

_ 'Cause you know we'll make it through _

_ We'll make it through _

_ Keep holding on _

_ Keep holding on _

_ There's nothing you could say _

_ Nothing you could do _

_ There's no other way when it comes to the truth _

_ So keep holding on _

_ 'Cause you know we'll make it through _

_ We'll make it through. _

_ "Those who deny freedom to others do not deserve it themselves." _

**Home is when I'm free. And now, as the sun set, and the darkness came, and I flew, and fell, and realized, and loved.**

Obi-Wan and Ahsoka never found another holochip in Anakin's starfighter. They cried together. Anakin Skywalker was gone. Forever, this time. 

**So take my memory. Take my life, and build my legacy. Make others see that my freedom comes in there's. Make them see, make them believe I am free.**

**Author's Note:**

> I know the ending cut off abruptly, but it was supposed to- like Anakin never really finished his work, so we're left forever, wondering what he would've said. Thanks for reading! Please, I'm begging you- help encourage others to vote. We can't make a difference unless we try.


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